I have a thought that I have not yet met in femspace.
So, having seen how vulnerable groups around the world help each other (Jews, LGBT, artists in exile, etc.), I think that feminists need to create a similar system.Only it is not necessary to help all women, as it is now, but only women feminists.
These groups over time have gained a lot of influence by sticking together and helping only people from their group. Meanwhile, feminism now is a classic co-dependence, an attempt to get women out of abusing relationships who themselves do not strive for this. They use feminism to replenish their resources and take them back to the agressor.
It's no secret that the "professional" disease of feminists is burnout - and this is inevitable when you endlessly help others, but you yourself do not receive help, and besides, you do not see that your efforts somehow change the world around you. In fact, our attempts to "re-educate" women are futile, this is a traumatic scenario. Even if they adopt femme ideas, they pervert them beyond recognition - and now feminism is turning into "the right to be a housewife and give birth" or "using one's sexuality to compete with men."
But, in fact, why are we doing this? Because we ourselves need some kind of women's community that will share our views and moral values, on which we can rely and receive protection, with whom we can identify ourselves and not feel ashamed. So let's create it right now, without postponing to some "ideal future" where women "realise".
Here is what I mean. I propose, for starters, to accept the very idea that we need to help ourselves, because we are the most valuable thing that feminism has. Many underestimate the importance of the human resource, but remember how long it took us to go through all the circles of studying materiel, how many internal conflicts we had to overcome, how many of us have already created - ideas, posts, videos, literary works, drawings and comics, music and so on, how many comments we have written, supporting the women's movement in various discussions. If we are lost to feminism due to burnout, due to excessive stress on the psyche, due to the fact that everything in life does not work out very well, then other people will have to go the same way, do it all from scratch, only to make up for the resulting void. And we still need to develop the movement.

We can and we should support each other. Perhaps, like me before, it seems to you that you have nothing special to share, but each of us has some skills, abilities, resources that can be useful in a given situation. This is the area in which you work or study, and your social skills, and knowledge from various fields, such as health or how to write books, your ability to explain or understand technology, knowledge of languages. Even things that are not obvious at first glance, such as the willingness to call on the phone and find out something (people with social anxiety will thank you!), or choose a hairstyle / clothes, or the ability to ride a bicycle, can be useful. In life, people have different situations, and you never know which skills will come in handy.

Also, a resource can be any property that you own or can use. Someone may need to spend the night in a foreign city, or drive somewhere by car, or work at a computer. Of course, you do not need to help in cases where it causes you discomfort. No codependency! Our goal is to create a community where you help others and can claim help in return when you need it.
Another important resource is various acquaintances, even superficial ones. You can get various information from acquaintances (for example, someone works in the legal field, or has experience moving, or knows where to buy products cheaply), you can also ask them for help or offer them your own ideas. For example, one of your acquaintances draws well, and another needs to make a cover for a book. Or one is a great cook, and the other is at work all the time and is ready to pay someone who will provide her with a ready-made diet. Perhaps here you (like me) will have to overcome some internal barrier associated with the fact that you want to do everything yourself, and not ask for anything, so as not to be obliged. But if you try to involve other people in your endeavors, then you will probably enjoy it, and you will look at it as an exciting sport.
Now that you have a better understanding of what resources you have to share with your community, let's talk about the practical side of the question - how to create this community. In fact, many of us already know each other at least through comments, many also sit in various chats or even create their own. The next step is to make this communication not only pleasant, but also useful.
The first thing I advise you to do is not to be afraid to write to the person who interested you. For example, you saw a comment that you really like and want to share your thoughts. Or it seems to you that the commentator understands the issue that interests you (for example, neuropsychology, or politics, or scriptwriting, whatever). We also write to the DM and ask about it. We communicate politely, remember that we are not owed anything, and we do not demand, but only offer a conversation. It can be difficult for someone to answer - for example, a person in a depressive phase. We don’t get upset and don’t think that it’s about us, instead we try to communicate with other feminists. Also, many are embarrassed to answer after a long break, because they are ashamed that they ignored you for so long. It is better to immediately indicate that you do not put pressure on the person and will be happy with the answer even after a long time. It can also be difficult for you to maintain an intense dialogue, but do not worry, the most important is to write from time to time so that the connection is not lost (if you want to keep it, of course), be interested in the affairs of the interlocutor. You don't have to talk all day long.

Next, you need to establish links between activists (that is, public admins, bloggers, members of various organizations). If you are an activist yourself, then you have a great opportunity to communicate with your followers/colleagues/comrades-in-arms.Choose those who are of interest to you and establish closer contact. If you yourself are someone's subscriber, you can also try to chat with the admin, but keep in mind that such people usually have a high workload, and it is better contact them with specific suggestions, and not just chat about something. For example, you can offer to help if you see that you can be useful.
If you are an activist, you can also connect with other activists and do joint projects. It's a way to get close, to make connections. For example, you can organize a meeting in real life, help with content, with promotion. Do not hesitate to help with personal matters, this creates stronger bonds than purely business formal communication.
Remember, we are actually very strong! If we turn our attention to the right place.
I invite you to share your thoughts on this topic. Maybe you had some experience of communicating with other feminists and helping each other? Or can you give any advice? This idea is still quite new to me, so I will pay a lot of attention to your comments, I think this will be reflected in future publications.


Author: Philosopher's Stone of Artémis
Translator: Yulia N.